Issue 1


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Krysta Rodriguez and MT students strike bold stances.    Photo by: Cori McKay

Krysta Rodriguez and MT students strike bold stances.

Photo by: Cori McKay

A New "SMASH" Hit Tradition ? 

Cori McKay - News Editor

As the sun set on Balboa Bay, the festivities began at OCSA’s second Season Premiere.  Last year’s event, starring Matthew Morrison, was meant to be something special for OCSA’s 30th anniversary, but with its rave reviews, it made its return with OCSA alum Krysta Rodriguez being the guest of honor. Rodriguez is one of OCSA’s most famous alumni, with various Broadway credits including “Spring Awakening” and “The Addams Family.” This event showcased Rodriguez’s talents, as well as that of many students here at OCSA across a variety of conservatories.

As the guests arrived they were immediately surrounded by the beautiful outdoor atmosphere of the Balboa Bay Club. During appetizers, guests enjoyed the vocal stylings of sophomore Hannah Eyre (CM) and senior Carson Ripley (CM), accompanied by students from OCSA’s Garn Family Jazz Studies program. After their suave renditions of iconic jazz standards, Rodriguez made her grand entrance, opening with “That’s Life”, made famous by Frank Sinatra, while making her way up to the stage.

Musical Theatre Conservatory Director Scott Barnhardt helped in putting this event together for his first year working at OCSA. He and Rodriguez, who have been friends for years, even performed a touching rendition of “River in the Rain” from “Big River” and “Blue Wind” from “Spring Awakening,” accompanied by sign language they had learned from being part of the cast of the Deaf West productions of the shows.  

Rodriguez also made it a point to feature the talents of high school students at OCSA in the Musical Theatre Conservatory, the conservatory Rodriguez was part of when she attended OCSA. One of the students chosen to take part in this performance was senior Ethan Clayton (MT). Though Clayton has been in a number of OCSA productions, he explains why this one was especially unique: “For being a big time Broadway performer, Krysta is so down to earth and naturally just a very sweet person. I absorbed so much new information just being in the room with her, and I feel that it has definitely strengthened me as a performer!”

Later into the set, which Rodriguez constructed to reflect moments in her life, Rodriguez explained how she took something negative and completely flipped it to be positive. Just after her 30th birthday, Rodriguez was diagnosed with breast cancer. Rodriguez faced the harsh realities of chemotherapy which would cause her to lose her hair. Instead of giving in to the obvious emotional toll this can have on someone, Rodriguez used her love of fashion to create a blog, “Chemo Couture,” where she then spent her chemo journey trying out and styling various wigs and hairstyles - from bald to waist length. She showed this journey through “My Strongest Suit” from “Aida,” accompanied by the MT students who carried large portraits of some of the looks she sported on her blog. This moment truly warmed the hearts of everyone in the venue including the students on stage with her.

The remainder of the set included Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah,” and Broadway hits “Bye Bye Blackbird” from “Fosse” and “It Won’t Be Long Now” from “In the Heights.” Rodriguez joked throughout the show about her short stint as Anna Vargas on NBC’s “Smash,” which was cancelled after two seasons. On the show, Rodriguez’s character performed “If I Were a Boy” by Beyoncé, however, this was only one of the many songs the series’ director considered choosing. Rodriguez playfully mocked the show’s song-choosing process by doing short renditions of many other options they could have gone with.  

To conclude the event, both Rodriguez and Barnhardt, a huge fan of the show, lived out their “Smash” fantasy by performing “Let Me Be Your Star”, the most popular tune from the show, adorned with bright, blonde Marilyn wigs which left the audience falling out of their seats.

From seeing how well this year's Season Premiere played out, we can look forward to a possible new OCSA tradition which Clayton fully supports: “Not only is it a great way to fundraise for OCSA, it's also a great way to showcase new talent and thereby see people's donations in action.”  Who could the next guest be?  Only another year at OCSA can tell.


Author Jayna Bosse supervises the Tower elevator    Photo by: Emilia Angotti

Author Jayna Bosse supervises the Tower elevator

Photo by: Emilia Angotti

Ups and Downs: Elevator Talk with Ciecek

Jayna Bosse - Staff Writer

Every student has used the elevator one time or another, but using it as a way to skip the stairs can lead you to unpleasant consequences. After going over the student handbook during the first week of school, many were left confused about the regulations regarding elevator use. Junior Brook Carslie (PD) emphasises her concern that, “ I don’t really understand how the rules work. This year they seem a lot stricter and I’m scared to even get on the elevator because I’m not about to get a detention or something”. We interviewed the Dean of Facilities and Supervision Mr. Ciecek to clear up the exact rules of elevator use.

It has been clarified that there were no changes between the previous rules set by Dr. Wallace and the current rules by Mr. Ciecek, contrary to popular belief that the new elevator rules have gotten stricter. Students are still permitted to use the elevator if they arrive to school after the bell has rung, as well as during class. He did warn that when using the elevator during class without a hall pass from your teacher, it is likely you will be issued a referral as well as a lunch detention. “The elevator is a tool, not a toy,” he noted. A second offense will add trash pickup to the referral and lunch detention, and if you take the elevator a third time without permission you can receive a suspension.

Ciecek wanted to remind students that the elevators are meant for the exclusive use of students who need it, rather than for leisure. “[Students who require the elevator] should not have to fight their way onto the elevator” Ciecek stated. In addition, students with large instruments or projects are not permitted to take the elevator without a pass. He recommended students with large items to speak to the office to see if they are eligible for a pass, but should not enter the elevator unless it’s deemed fair. So the next time you think about hopping on the elevator to avoid walking up to seventh floor, consider the real reason the elevators are here and why the rules are set in the first place.

The Mock Trial Team    Photo Courtesy of: Whitney Coates

The Mock Trial Team

Photo Courtesy of: Whitney Coates

Order in the Court

Spencer Riley - Staff Writer

This year marks the creation of OCSA’s Mock Trial Club. This club headed by U.S. History and AP Government and Economics teacher Julie Scheppele plans to teach students valuable experiences with political argument in a different way then they would learn with JSA. “We had students involved in JSA in the past years and there’s a lot of excitement about politics and law here at OCSA, and students who are super involved and aware of what’s going on.  Mock Trial is this amazing civil education program that connects students with community volunteers and members of the justice system.”

When commenting on the similarities and differences between JSA and the Mock Trial Club, Scheppele said, “Mock Trial is a lot less political than JSA. JSA is more of a debate club. They’re going to talk about controversial issues. They’re going to practice debating against other schools. Mock Trial is stepping into a courtroom, taking a case, and playing the roles of the lawyers, witnesses, clerk, and bailiff, arguing a case against other teams’ prosecution or defense, having a real judge sit and listen, and having attorneys keeping score on how people are doing.” While JSA primarily focuses on arguing different sides of an issue, the Mock Trial Club is more focused on the art and process of arguing in a courtroom.

Scheppele is hopeful for the club’s future on campus and that it will “be an opportunity for students whether they want to pursue law in the future or if they want to pursue a new avenue in their art.” Students from a variety of arts backgrounds can participate, sticking to something they’re used to or stepping out of their comfort zone and trying something new.    

Club members were chosen through an audition process as described by senior Ben Palajac (ACT): “The audition consisted of writing our own speech so the judges could gauge our public speaking ability, and memorizing a witness statement so we would be able to do well under the pressure of a cross examination.” Students like Palajac who don’t usually have a chance to experience the world of law may develop an interest in it and pursue it as a career. “I joined the club because I have always been interested in becoming a lawyer. Being lead trial counsel for the prosecution this year has definitely sparked my interest in studying criminal law in the future.”

    Mock Trial offers students an interesting window in the world of law and debate in a different way than clubs like JSA have in the past. It provides students with a new way to apply their art and envision their future.


OCSA's JSA Chaptrer at Fall State 2016    Photo Courtesy of: JSA

OCSA's JSA Chaptrer at Fall State 2016

Photo Courtesy of: JSA

JSA: Bringing OCSA's Political Opinions to Life

Kat Long - Staff Writer

Whether it be debates on the death penalty or pineapple on pizza, OCSA students involved in the Junior State of America use their creativity and political passion to unfold the current issues of today.

    Starting as a club at OCSA in 2014 and continuing on today, JSA has allowed many eager students to share their opinions and become more involved in the world of politics.

When asked what inspired senior and current JSA co-president Thomas Martinez (CAH) to join the club, he said “I joined my freshman year, my sister told me to join since I was interested in politics.” Senior and co-President Cooper Lichacz (FTV) was also inspired by his sister, saying that “she had a lot of fun and developed a lot as a person; seeing what it did for her made me want to join.”

JSA is a political organization for high schoolers that gives students the opportunity to discuss and share their political ideas in a professional environment. This allows them to practice and enhance their leadership and debate skills.

While JSA meetings are held during school hours, students have the opportunity to participate in multiple conventions each year, allowing them to meet new people and express their ideas. “It gives students the ability to see inside a profession and get engaged with local and national politics,” Martinez said.

Amidst a new era of political power, co-presidents Martinez and Lichacz strive to improve OCSA’s chapter. “I want people to be able to present arguments with proper evidence,” Martinez said, “since this is something that has been disregarded in recent politics.”

Another issue within the club is the heavy liberal bias among students involved. Although OCSA is known as a more liberal school, political opinions vary among all students. “There’s an element that conservative people generally don’t feel comfortable.” said Lichacz. This something that the two presidents hope to change in the coming year by increasing the political diversity within the club.

Club members have noticed a strong decline in participants as years have gone by. “It’s gotten a lot smaller,” said junior Chaney Lieberman (CV). “Adding people to the chapter will help a lot.”  Having joined JSA last year and quickly getting involved, Lieberman said how “JSA is totally beneficial, and allows us to talk about real world problems and be aware of our surroundings.” Lieberman is currently our Southern California Southern Empire Region Senator, one of the many positions that allow students to govern JSA on the state level.

OCSA’s chapter continues to be involved and bring creativity to an organization of more than 30 different Southern California schools. “Our chapter has some of the most state involvement,” Martinez said. While students show leadership within our school, OCSA students also show strong interest in positions on the state level, focusing on the organization as a whole. “By being an OCSA student, you are automatically well rounded,” Lichacz said. “We have artistic and international perspectives.”

Through opportunities at meetings and conventions, JSA allows students to meet new people and be exposed to new ideas. “I like what it stands for,” said Martinez. “It’s a place for communication and community.”


The Art Attack Set    Photo by: Spencer Riley

The Art Attack Set

Photo by: Spencer Riley

What's Up With Art Attack?

Caroline Meredith - Managing Editor

Friday dance parties on 10th Street, #ocsaspook, and Art Attack Live: all unique fixtures of our school culture that have come to define us a student body. However, in the last few weeks, it has been hard to ignore that Art Attack Live, to put it simply, has been a mess. With promiscuous beer commercials and entire episodes without sound, OCSA students and teachers alike are wondering, “What’s up with Art Attack?”.

One thing that should be noted, though, is that the glitches are not the fault of the Art Attack staff. Senior Isabel Mansour (FTV) is the producer of Art Attack, and noted that these glitches are nothing new: “So there was a streamer called Matrix Stream that was used to send out the live broadcast to the school. Even last year there were several problems with it suddenly not streaming one day and then working the next. We came back from summer vacation to find that it didn't work, period.” Senior and Art Attack engineer Cooper Lichacz (FTV) set out to find a new operating system, including a new way to embed the audio and visuals. The current solution is Twitch, a streaming website.

One of the main grievances that people have with Twitch is the inappropriate ads that sometimes play before Art Attack begins to stream.  However, AP Psychology teacher Maya Kohn is not too bothered by the ads: “I have all seniors, and they can see it all on TV, so that’s not the problem.” She, like many OCSA teachers, is more concerned that she is wasting class time trying to get the show to work. “I feel like I don’t start class on time because I have to keep reloading Art Attack over and over until it doesn’t glitch. I’m over it.”

Mansour explained that they are trying to switch to Youtube, which could help with the glitchiness and get rid of the controversial ads. Yes, we can only hope that Art Attack Live will return to its former glory and once again hilariously deliver essential news to the OCSA community.

At the time of printing, Art Attack has just switched over to Youtube and is streaming much more efficiently.

Scott Barnhardt guides rehearsal for "The Drowsy Chaperone"    Photo by: Emili Baggarly

Scott Barnhardt guides rehearsal for "The Drowsy Chaperone"

Photo by: Emili Baggarly

New School Year Brings New Changes to MT

Thalia Atallah - Staff Writer

Sitting in the audition waiting room. Looking around at the massive amount of students ranging in age, a nervous feeling swelling the entire space. Rows of students dressed up in their sharpest audition attire. The sound of constant vocal warm-ups as people prepare for their audition. People holding their phones to their ears and walking in circles attempting to hear a recording of their audition song. This is a snippet of what students of the Musical Theater conservatory experienced a few weeks ago during audition night. This coincided with the changes that have been made to the Musical Theater conservatory this school year by the new director, Scott Barnhardt. His presence in the conservatory has allowed for many revisions, one being that all students in grades 9-12 may audition for every show instead of having one show for 9th and 10th grade and one show for 11th and 12th grade. Senior Anna Salvini (MT) stated that “It is very different, I helped out at auditions and there were a lot of people; that was overwhelming, especially at call backs since so many kids were called back. However there is now a lot of competition which is a good thing”.  

MT students of every grade expressed their concern with the overwhelming amount of talent that appeared during audition nights. Junior Pua Patu Tanielu (MT) says, “I like it because we are all together and get to experience these auditions as a whole conservatory and it allows more opportunities for people, but there is a definite con of possible superiority.” Overall, MT students believe the changes in the MT auditioning process are a challenge, but one that they are up for.  

There have also been new classes added to MT this year. Some of these include Mind, Body, Voice, Theater in Action, and Classical Voice. With these new classes come new teachers who are eager to share their knowledge like Broadway alum Jessica Lea Patty. Sophomore Madeleine Curry (MT) expresses her contentment with the affair: “I really like all of my teachers and have been enjoying conservatory and how professional my teachers are this year.” Salvini agrees and says, “Conservatory has definitely increased in intensity with the curriculum and teachers which I think is a good thing; it can allow MT students to be more serious and learn more.”

Opinions about the changes to MT have been mixed throughout each grade but are definitely more positive than negative. One thing is certain: MT students are looking forward to seeing what else Mr. Barnhardt has to offer. They are accepting the change and adapting to the new environment. As a thespian would say, the show must go on!

Alice Hanson (third from left) and the Spanish Honor Society board    Photo courtesy of: Elizabeth Hall

Alice Hanson (third from left) and the Spanish Honor Society board

Photo courtesy of: Elizabeth Hall

Si Si Oui Oui: Let's Talk Language Honor Society

Katrina Hung - Staff Writer

Language honor societies. While most OCSA students acknowledge the existence of both French and Spanish Honor Society, few know the real reasons for why they exist.  

According to senior Aleece Hanson (IA), who is the current Spanish Honor Society president, the focus of the society is to immerse themselves in the Spanish speaking culture.  “We do this by having cultural events such as having an altar at Noche de Altares or visiting Mission San Juan Capistrano,” she stated.

Likewise, senior Matt Matusiewicz (CW), current president of French Honor Society, said that “the chapter provides a vehicle for focusing activities around French language and encouraging members to continue scholarship within the Francophone community.”

Through different events surrounding either French or Spanish culture, the members are able to have real life experiences and gain access to learning opportunities that would not have been otherwise available.  

In addition to learning about the cultures, these language honor societies also dedicate their time to helping around the community. Spanish Honor Society has done various community service projects such as visiting MOMS Orange County, a women’s shelter in Santa Ana, and making books as well as Christmas cards for families with students in the Santa Ana Unified School District. “Our chapter is so lucky to be in the city of Santa Ana, a primarily Spanish-speaking community, because we can get out there and work very closely with people in need rather than being a remote volunteer organization. I hope that we will be able to meet with our neighbors in Santa Ana and work together with them to learn from each other,” said Hanson.  

By focusing on Santa Ana, the members are able to acquire new experiences and practice their Spanish at the same time. For many, these projects are also a way to become more aware of community issues and simply just help those around. Although the French Honor Society has been primarily focused on school events in the past, Matusiewicz is hopeful that community projects, similar to Spanish Honor Society, will be implemented this year.

So in the end, what is the future of these language societies? Hanson hopes that under her guidance, Spanish Honor Society members will be able to “gain a bigger appreciation for the Spanish language and Spanish speaking cultures and venture outside of their cultural backgrounds and learn more about others.” French Honor Society is directing its goals more towards extending outreach to the French-speaking community. According to Matusiewicz, “We will be looking more towards creating positive social change within the the Francophone community here at OCSA and others as we can. Whether we make little ripples or big waves this year, we are changing something, someone’s life.”

Photo courtesy of: Joshua Wood

Photo courtesy of: Joshua Wood

Enter the Sound Dimension

Mr.Wood - CW Director

In the interests of brevity, branding, secrecy, and straight-up creativity, complex titles and ideas are often abbreviated into smaller, more pronounceable units: NASA, laser, lol, The Patriot Act (look it up).  

Some acronyms stay in static letter form when pronounced—FBI, PS, FYI—but the elite acronyms ascend into the realm of pure sound and are reborn once again as words: scuba, potus, yolo, OCSA.

So I propose that OCSA, an institution of shifting spellings, trailblazing innovation—and breakneck time management—transforms its conservatory abbreviations from the current letter pronunciation to word forms.

Let’s take CW, my home base. It would no longer be known by the letters C-W, but by its word form “Cw,” like the beginning of the word What in French (Quoi?) and the start of the words quiet or quill—both, oddly, super appropriate when describing many creative writers.

V [period] A [period] become “Va,” like the start of the word What in Swedish, (Wad?) and the initial sound of veneer or Valhalla.

Many of the sound terms bear an uncanny relationship with their conservatory. “Ftv,” when you say it repeatedly, sounds like a roll of film flapping on the spool after the movie has ended: “Ftvftvftvftvftvftvftv.”

“Mt” is like an enunciation exercise in itself: “I know New York I need New York I know I need unique New York” and “mm-t, mm-t, mm-t.”

“Act”—well that one’s obvious.

“Imp”… well that one fits really well too.  

The most challenging conservatories changeovers are probably in dance. With CCD and CMD, you might want to the initial C as a sibilant S instead of the cutting K sound. But that won’t do. No, no—that definitely will not do.

“Ccd” sounds like you’re saying “cooked,” but in an infinitely more pleasing way. Let “ccd” echo and it sounds like part of the theme song from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, “Oh Yeah.” It is definitely one of the more edgy conservatory sounds either way. You can kind of see the ccd dancers staring you down when you say it in a “We are the Jets!” sort of way.

And “Cmd” is actually an Irish female name. (It’s pronounced Coo-mi-da, but spelled Pragmatik.)

“Cah” has a velvet nonchalance that might make it the envy of the other sounds. Like “meh”—but not meh.

The letter-to-sound conservatory title changeover might take a little practice, but practice is what excellent art is all about. Plus, given the quickness with which OCSA operates, streamlining the pronunciation of conservatory titles only makes sense. It also adds that much more flair to an already popping place.

So what do you say? Will you sound out for change?

Language is a flexible and living thing—let it stretch and breathe by stepping with into the next dimension, the dimension of sound.

Photo courtesy of: Hannah Enriquez

Photo courtesy of: Hannah Enriquez

Train Kids

Hannah Enriquez - Staff Writer

Underneath the train lies the never-ending tracks that wind all around the cities in California. But  what goes on above the tracks is where all the excitement resides. With the top car full of a mix of extremely loud, tired, and dysfunctional OCSA kids, there’s always a new story to be told around the blue lunch tables at school. Sophomore Mariah Williams (MT) describes her northbound group saying “We’re like family. On the train, you'll find people who have your back, but that's not to say they’ll wait for you if you're late.”

The train is not your average ride to school, as it includes stops, several bothered adults, and most importantly, your friends and classmates. Junior Wyatt Larrabee (MT) reveals, “You really get to know someone when you see them everyday at 6 in the morning.” They sleep, work, and stick together, so it's no question why they have such close relationships. And although taking the train seems like a concrete and consistent way to get to school, there are certain elements of taking the train, that makes it such a different experience everyday. Senior Sabrina Cohen (CCD) recalled a time when she watched a  priest take out a container of water after getting off the train, and throw some of the water at it, before the train left. He stretched out his hand, closed his eyes, and seemed to be reciting a prayer. “I’m Jewish, so I don’t really know what a baptism looks like but I’m pretty sure I witnessed a live baptism, for the very first time, that day.” But the train was not the only thing that is blessed. The friends of Sophomore Kyle Kim (PD) were blessed with his Mickey Mouse shaped waffles when he took his waffle maker on the the train for a day. His friends helped him fan out the smoke so he wouldn't set off the smoke detectors while the adults stared and took pictures. “There's no sign that says you can't make waffles,” Kim defends.

These two instances make taking the train sound like all fun and games, but using this means of transportation comes with risks. For some, the train can make for an ideal place to nap. Especially after a long day at school, the sound of the wheels on the tracks with the light swaying of the car can easily lull a tired student to sleep. Junior Pua Patu Tanielu (MT) recalls a time when she fell asleep and missed her stop. She woke up to find not one person left in the car. Not only did she miss her stop, but she missed all of them. Patu Tanielu made it all the way to the train yard, where they keep the trains at night. “I walked through the entire train to the last car, and the guy who was supposed to fix or clean the train let me off. He told me to follow the tracks back to the station. I was so scared, but after walking for a while, a white van started to follow me. It was a van full of conductors and they gave me a ride to the station, even though my mom told me to not go with them. It was an exhausting and draining experience, but I finally got back with my mom and the security guard. I’ll never fall asleep like that again.”

You can never know for sure what to expect, taking the train, but at the end of the day when you finally reach your stop and make your way home, the train is an overall memorable experience. Even after they graduate, the robot voice will forever ring in their heads, and in their hearts. “Now approaching: Santa Ana. Please watch your steps while moving through the train, to the door. Santa Ana.”

Man on the Street: Does Every Minute Count?

What’s your take on our new dismissal time? What will you do with your five extra minutes?

AJ Takata CW 18 by Isabelle Grybow.jpg

Senior AJ Takata (CW)

I barely noticed - I mean, it’s 5 minutes! Actually, I guess it's kind of important to me since I take the bus. But - 5 minutes!

It's another 5 minutes I wait at the bus stop.


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Sophomore Faith Garcia (FTV)

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Senior Quinn Dahl (IA)

I don't like that it impacts some students who take the bus because it makes the stairwells crowded when they leave, and they originally left early just to avoid that.

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Brenda Smith (IA and ACT Teacher)

Well, the good news is people don’t leave early. If it’s convenient for the bus, that’s great, but class just feels shorter.

Fashion Theme : Soft Grunge With Individual Flare

Emilia Angotti - Staff Writer

It seems as though every time you go on your Instagram explore page, you are barraged with Dickies pants paired with a grommet belt topped off with a classic brand tee. Maybe some black fishnets if you're lucky. On campus we just happen to have an abundance of outfits that emulate the soft grunge aesthetic. Here are some OCSA kids’ interpretations the current trend.


Sophomore Jacob Aguilar (FTV)

Agular is always trying out new things with his clothing whether it be a Puma choker, or a belt around his neck. Here Agular sports brown illusion pants stapled with a grommet belt and black velcro vans, adding his own flare with an Asian style shirt. He compliments his look with a red and black aesthetic to top off his grunge look.

Junior Lillie Radziminsky (MT)

Turning soft grunge to a feminine side pairing a cut-out dress and classic boot doc martens. Radziminsky always has her own twist accented on this soft grunge style showing off her personal style she's adapted throughout the years.



Sophomore Isabel Pulido (ACT)

Pulido pairs a black cinched tube top with a set of red and white striped high waisted pants. She completes the look with a pair of old school black creeper style vans.

Freshmen Jonathan Truong (MT)

Truong styles his plain black jeans with an oversized flame and skull tee. To complete his look,  he compliments the black and white skull and flame decal with grommet belt,  topping it off with a  wallet chain.

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Students here at OCSA really just like to showcase who they are through their fashion Whether it's wearing gingham pants, or a bandana on their head, fashion is all about showcasing who you are through your clothes.

With this trend resurfacing from 90s post 2000s, people have constructed grunge style to become linked with softer tones. Meaning less flannels, more grommet styles. This individual twist on things can go as far from or as close to home as the person wants too. From channeling your inner Bratz doll, to originating back to Dickies and a tank top, this genre has no limit in what can be done. The only direction is the one you point it to.



Photo Contest Winner

Photo by Eighth-Grader Lauren Cottrell (MT)

Photo by Eighth-Grader Lauren Cottrell (MT)


This photo was taken this summer while exploring Italy with my choir the "National Childrens Chorus". It was a beautiful summer day in Venice when we toured the canals of this beautiful city.

Ask Evelyn

Dear Evelyn,
I want to ask a random boy who I do not know to formal for funsies please give me advice.

Dear Person,
I applaud your confidence in asking a stranger to formal! I have found that the way to a man’s heart is through his funny bone. Perhaps create a humorous poster or a comical song and dance to ask your beau to attend the dance with you. Check out Youtube, the kids are doing the craziest “prom-posals” nowadays! And, if all else fails, don’t fret going to the dance with your gal (and guy) pals. I’ve only gone to school dances with my friends, and I’m totally not bitter about it. Not bitter at all!

Dear Evelyn,
How do I nicely tell kids with roller backpacks that everybody wants to throw them and their backpacks off of 7th floor because they get in the way of literally everything?
Concerned and frustrated student

Dear Concerned and Frustrated Student,
I too have felt the urge to drop kick rolling backpacks and their humans off the roof of the Tower. Then, I stop and think, would that relieve OCSA of its rolling backpack traffic? No. No, it would not. Therefore, I would recommend investing in a stress ball or learning to breathe it out instead of confronting the students in question. It is likely that their parents are making them roll their backpacks as glorified suitcases, and they are probably already dealing with crippling humiliation that will take years of therapy to sort out. Who knows, maybe in 50 years we’ll all have debilitating back pain from years of lugging around our textbooks and the rolling backpack students of OCSA will have the last laugh.

Dear Evelyn,
I need your help it's an emergency! I dabbed on the haters like Jake Paul told me too, but the haters dabbed back! What do I do! Please help me, I'm scared!
Scared Dabber

Dear Scared Dabber,
Being a true Jake Pauler means dabbing on the haters even when it is scary. Learn to conquer your fears or you may never be a member of #Team10, and is what kind of life is that?