Importance of Hanging Out

Sofie Dooley

Do you ever come back from a long-awaited hangout with your best friends and feel the odd weight of unfulfillment? It’s hard to pinpoint why this is happening; these are your favorite people and you had been planning to go  see this movie for weeks. What I have discovered in the past two years or so with my friends is that the secret to fulfilling and authentic friendships is “hanging out.” What I mean by hanging out is constant last minute planning to just be around each other with no set time or activities. However, you may be thinking, “Be realistic Sofie, we are OCSA students! We don’t have the time for that!” While I know this is true, I don’t think kids and teens today understand how important it is to make time for hanging out. 

When investigating why the phenomenon of “hanging out” has been declining so much in recent years, I came up with a few solutions. First, the COVID-19 pandemic. So much time spent in isolation in such formative years most definitely has put a dent in our social lives. Secondly—and most prominently in my opinion—phones and the internet. Phones are ruining everything when it comes to friendships. The excessive planning on group chats and shared calendars make the task of planning hangouts seem like a business meeting. Planning weeks in advance, coordinating dress codes, determining times and arranging who's riding with whom, leads to the inevitable conclusion of bailing when the hangout comes due to the sheer anxiety and weight around it all. In addition to that, social media creates so many expectations as to what you should be doing with your friends, leading most teens to believe that their mundane plans aren’t enough in comparison to everyone on Instagram. I think what everyone needs to realize is that the true magic IS in the mundane. Hanging around on a patio, being a little bit bored sometimes, taking trains to nowhere is where you get to really be yourself because there are no expectations. Days like these have led to the best times I’ve ever had and the best friendships I’ve ever made. 

You may be thinking that I have a ton of free time and that is how I get to do this. But I really, truly do not and I know most students here don’t either. To “hang out” with your friends, despite an insanely busy schedule, these are my tips. Number one, do NOT have a planning group chat. It gets repetitive and takes out all of the show of being together. Talk about plans in person and follow through with them. Number two, be comfortable with your friends enough to be able to invite them to the events in your busy schedule. Bring them to rehearsals, shows, practices and hangouts with other friends. This may seem like a weird thing to do, but it really isn’t, trust me. Another great tip is to utilize public transportation! Metrolink is free right now for students and goes pretty much everywhere from Los Angeles to downtown San Diego, so go on a little adventure—it’s free! Prioritize your friendships more than you would think to. People forget that maintaining friendships is just as important as working out or sleeping to maintain your health. This could mean laying back on studying once in a while. I promise, it will be okay. Lastly and most importantly, get off your phone! It is so important to look people in the face when they are talking and to be invested in your conversations with others. 

The time is now—hang out with your friends! Make this summer your best yet. With all of my advice, I wish you luck in your future endeavors of hanging out.